Why I believe divorce and remarriage is wrong.

The purpose of this blog is to detail my personal experiences taking a stand against divorce and remarriage. I come from a broken home myself and know of the pain and heartache that it can cause firsthand. I was twelve years old when my parents separated; everyone told me that it was an unfortunate but normal part of growing up for many people, and that I would need to get over it. I knew in my heart that it was terribly wrong for my Mom and I to move away from my Dad, but I tried to accept all of the "good reasons for it" proffered by my Mom and her many counselors. I spent my teenage years denying what I knew in my heart to be true, that God hates divorce and equates remarriage with adultery. When my Dad finally stopped waiting for my Mom to come back and married another woman, I again told myself that it was OK; and participated in my Dad's wedding ceremony. His marriage lasted only a few years; soon he was divorced again, and looking for a third wife. I was still in denial when my Dad married for the third time. Shortly after my Dad took his third wife, I realized the truth about marriage, divorce and remarriage. Prove it you say? If you believe that scripture is the inspired word of God (you know deep in your heart that it is), then you should be interested in my subsequent blogs. These postings are not for the faint of heart. The decisions that I have made because of my beliefs have been costly. True belief requires action. Words are to thoughts what actions are to faith.

The bullet points below are designed to be read only after you have read the accompanying scripture.

1. Marriage is only broken by death.
   
   • Romans 7:1-4
     
   • I Cor. 7:39
     
   • Divorce does not dissolve you of the marriage contract under the law.
     
   • Separation does not dissolve the marriage contract under the law.
     
   • All of man’s laws do not dissolve the marriage contract under God’s law.
   
   
2. The law is not for the righteous but for the unrighteous.
   
   • I Timothy 1:8-11
     
   • If the believer wants to follow the law then he must keep all of it.
   
   
3. The Spirit teaches the believer what to do.
   
   • I John 2:27
     
   • John 16:12-15
     
   • The believer is not to look to the law, but to listen to the Spirit.
   
   
4. The believer is to listen to the Spirit even if it contradicts the law.
   
   • Acts 10:9-16
     
   • Matt. 12:1-8
     
   • The fact that the law said it was wrong to eat the unclean thing did not keep the Spirit from telling Peter to break the law.
     
   • Jesus is the Lord of the Sabbath.
     
   • God can do whatever He wants.
     
   • The only thing that made eating shrimp before Jesus’ ascension wrong was that God said it was wrong.
     
   • The only thing that made eating shrimp after Jesus’ ascension acceptable was that God said it was acceptable.
     
   • God did not change or become unholy because He changed His mind.
     
   • The meat was not evil in and of itself.
     
   • Ignoring God’s voice is what is evil.
   
   
5. Divorce is only permissible under the law during the betrothal period.
   
   • Matt. 1:18-25
     
   • Matt. 5:31-32
     
   • Luke 16:18
     
   • Matt. 15:19
     
   • Matt. 19:3-9
     
   • The betrothal period was before the actual marriage; it was similar to our engagement period.
     
   • Fornication is sex before you are married. If you are married it is impossible to fornicate. I Cor. 7:2.
     
   • Adultery is sex with someone other than the one to which you are married.
     
   • If fornication and adultery are synonymous, why are they listed separately in Matt. 15:19?
     
   • You can fornicate before you are married; you cannot fornicate after you are married.
     
   • Adultery is not the word that is used in the “exception clause”.
     
   • Sex before marriage during the betrothal period is fornication not adultery; therefore, you cannot be divorced because of adultery.
     
   • You were called husband and wife under the Jewish law if you where betrothed, even though you were not living together or having sexual relations. Matt. 1:18-25
     
   • There is NO case for divorce because of adultery under current American legal and social tradition.
   
   
6. God hates divorce
   
   • Mal. 2:14-16
     
   • It is not of the Spirit
     
   • It does not apply to anyone in modern day society.
   
   
7. God has commanded believers by the Spirit not to divorce or depart from each other.
   
   • I Cor. 7:10-11
     
   • If you have done either than you need to repent and make it right.
   
   
8. What we do in the USA is not divorce; it is separation
   
   • I Cor. 7:5
     
   • Separation is not of the Spirit except for a short time for prayer and fasting
   
   
9. God commanded the husband not to divorce his wife (during the betrothal period).
   
   • I Cor. 7:11
   
   
10. God commanded the wife not to depart from her husband. Women could not get a divorce under the Jewish law, only men.
    
    • I Cor. 7:10
    
    
11. Remarriage while the spouse is alive is not of the Spirit.
    
    • Matt. 19:9
      
    • Luke 16:18
      
    • Matt. 5:31-32
      
    • Since there was no way for a woman to get a divorce or leave her husband under Jewish law, God left no way for her to remarry.
      
    • The man instigated all divorces, and a man could not remarry after a divorce without it being adulterous.
      
    • Whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
      
    • Remarriage for the divorced woman always ends in adultery.
      
    • Keep in mind that this only applies to people who were divorced during betrothal (engagement). Do you know anybody who this applies to? I don’t. People in the US are not divorced according to God, only grievously separated from their spouses.
      
    • How can you remarry if you’re not divorced?
    
    
12. Polygamy is not of the Spirit.
    
    • Matt. 19:4-6
      
    • If you say that polygamy is of the Spirit, then you must be willing to be reconciled to all of your wives and have them all live under your roof. People in the U.S. may be willing to use polygamy to justify their sinful remarriage but I doubt any of them are willing to live as polygamists.
      
    • It may have been acceptable under the old covenant, but it is not now. Jesus says that it was not so from the beginning. In the beginning God made them male and female, not male and female and female and female and female. He created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Eve and Sue and Beth.
    
    
13. A certificate of divorce was given to those with hard hearts that did not have the Spirit.
    
    • Matt 19:4-6
      
    • John 10:28-30
      
    • Divorce is not an option for us who have the Spirit.
      
    • The word divorce is not synonymous with the word disunion.
      
    • Divorce means to let loose of
      
    • If I let loose of, and am disjoined from my wife; does that mean if I let loose of God that I am disjoined from Him? What God has joined man cannot disjoin.
    
    
14. Remarriage was practiced but not acceptable in the Old Testament
    
    • Duet. 24:1-4
      
    • Duet. 22:13-30
      
    • If the first man sent her away because of fornication, she should be stoned under the old covenant law, not sent to another man.
      
    • If the second man dies or sends her away, she should be stoned not sent back to the first man.
      
    • To keep someone alive who has been defiled by fornication brings sin on the land.
    
    
15. What is our response as believers to those who will not repent?
    
    • Matt. 18:15-20
      
    • I Cor. 5
      
    • I Cor. 12:13
      
    • II Cor. 3:5-6
      
    • Try to win your brother over.
      
    • If you cannot win him over, purge the leaven from the lump
      
    • Do not keep mix up with any so-called brother who is openly fornicating—don’t even eat with such a one.
      
    • Put away from yourselves the evil person.
      
    • Your responsibility extends to all those who claim the name of Christ.